Tuesday, February 21, 2012

Puzzled

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I am, and always have been a rather disorganized individual. It has caused me a few problems over the course of my life, missing assignments later located in the chaos of my school-desk, snowy mornings waiting for the bus with no coat because all seven of them were lost inside my locker, and a constant battle with my parents over the state of my bedroom. As I neared adulthood, not much changed. As I found myself pregnant, I decided it was time to buckle down. Unfortunately a lifetime of bad habits are not easy to change, and though I convinced myself that Hazel's impending arrival would in fact transform my whole life into one of sense and order, that isn't quite what has happened. In fact since she was born I have struggled to make much sense of anything around here. It is a constant battle for me to wake up and eat breakfast in the morning, (not in the clinically-depressed sense, but in the I think I'll sleep in till 10 and then rush to get to where I need to be sense) let alone fold laundry, plan meals, stick to any sort of a budget, or pick up after my now-crawling-nine-month-old. So what is a girl to do? Trust me I have been trying. And trying and trying and trying! At times I feel completely hopeless as I look around at my home and life in dissaray. I have honestly never set a goal that I consciously achieved. Never set a schedule that I stuck to. Never kept a single room organized. Never balanced a check-book. I feel like I need to completely start over, wipe the slate clean, begin again....but I don't know how. I have tried to start small. Breakfast every morning. I failed the first few days. I tried to make a meal plan and a grocery list for a week. It worked for that week, but the next week it fell apart. I tried to make a cleaning schedule, Monday the loft, Tuesday the bathroom and so on, but like everything else, I just didn't stick to it. My lack of planning is really beginning to have an effect on our quality of life here, and my plans for the future, and I have to get it together! So tell me, is there like a twelve step program? A professional who will come and put my life in order? HELP!?

4 comments:

Jamie said...

Well, if you figure it out, let me know because I'm disorganized 99% of the time. It's awful.

As for the green pants, $15 at Forever 21 and they are SO comfortable! They're out right now (at least the one at University Parkway - I was there last night), but a girl there said they get colored jeans in every few weeks. Best pants ever! And you can't beat the price.

Also, I completely agreed with everything you said in your post about parenting. I used to be so judgemental of other parents. Then I had my own and I've been eating my words every since. Very humbling.

For what it's worth, you seem like such a great mom. Hazel is lucky to have you. She seems very loved.

Jamie said...

Also, I love your blog layout. Is it just through blogger? I want one!

kaelee said...

hmm might have to make a trip to gateway, I can't pass up that price. Also, while I was trying out different layouts, backgrounds and headers I looked around at some of my favorite well-designed blogs and realized how simple they were, So that's what I went for. It is just a blogger layout wiped clean.

Hollywood said...

One of the best things I ever did (do) to help me organize is just to have LESS STUFF. I get rid of things left and right. ALL.THE.TIME. When everything has a place, its less stressful when a mess happens because its easier to put away. It also helps me be more carefree and not attached to physical THINGS.
As far as time management...you got me there. Hence quitting Facebook. Simplifying always helps me not feel so overwhelmed with everything I feel like I have to get done.

You're a Grasshopper in a world of Ants, like me.
Just find the simple things that work for you and let go of the rest. Nobody said you have to be Martha Stewart! And I bet even she isn't as organized as she comes across! haha!